Wednesday, 7 August 2013
Jon Bear's Journal: The Man (Bear) Cave Part II: Rules of the Man Cave
In considering the rules of the man cave the most important thing to understand is the men are unique, so while certain man cave's may share certain rules, they are all likely to vary on some level relative to the man who creates those rules for HIS cave. That is as it should be. It's wise to post the rules at the entrance way so that anyone who is offered and accepts entering that space has done so on the authority of it's owner, having agreed to abide by the stated rules. Having rules are important to establish a code of conduct.
Here are the rules that I would want for my man cave and my reasoning for them:
Rule One: The Man Cave is for Men
What it Means: This is a place designed for male bonding and friendships between men. As such there is a chance that what might be viewed in normal social circles as inappropriate language or behavior is more acceptable because the cave allows you to relax your social etiquette to a degree. Also, it should be more often than not inhabited by men.
Rule Two: The Man Cave is not an a place to Discriminate
What it Means: If you are a man (or a woman) who is a friend and are invited to the man cave, it should be a place that you can go to without having to worry about being discriminated against. *This is the New England Liberal in me raring it's head a bit I suppose*
Rule Three: The Man Cave is a Place for Fun and Relaxation
What it Means: The Man Cave is a place to relax and take your mind off things. It is not a place to find advice in personal issues. It is not a place to discuss problems with your wife or children or workplace. Outside the cave that is fine, but inside the cave is for focusing on the group or cave activity (translation = for focusing on FUN). Anyone who slips up is subject to a fine and a 1 dollar donation to the Man Cave Kitty.
Rule Four: Destruction or Theft of Man Cave property is prohibited
What it Means: Don't mess with my stuff! We're here to have fun and build friendships. Accidents do happen, but while the cave is a place to be care free it's not a place to be careless or reckless.
Rule Five: The Man Cave is not for Children
What it Means: This rule might seem to discriminate, but it's here because adult language and adult material may exist in the man cave. Violent movies or video games and adult language may not be appropriate for children to be hearing. While different parents will have different rules for their children, the man cave is not a place to distinguish between those rules, or what is right for one parent's child versus another.
Rule Six: The Man Cave is open on Sunday's (from 12pm till 12am) and one night a week (6pm-12am)
What it Means: People will have different, varying hours for their man caves. I think it's vital to create hours of operation for your Man Cave and adhere to them. As I stated in rule 3, the Man Cave is a place to relax in. It should not however be a place to "escape to". The Man Cave is not a place of refuge to get away from your wife or your life or lose focus on your family or work responsibilities. No one should spend too much time in a cave. Life out side the cave is the priority and the cave itself is a respite.
Those would be the main rules governing my own personal Man Cave if I ever have one. Any money given to the Man Cave Kitty would be used to help finance something new for the Man Cave. If you had your own personal space designed primarily for male or female bonding what rules would you have for that place?